Finding The Wins IN A Day
Chasing a dream is all about managing expectations. When we have the appropriate expectations for what we are entering, we can maintain our energy much more easily. There is a balance in setting expectations. Optimists have their hopes dashed too quickly, while pessimists can lose hope altogether.
Finding a way to stay in the middle will be different for every person. For some, it starts with gratitude journaling. For others, it involves ending the day with the person they love. For me, I find the most success with getting one win a day. If every moment were a win, that would be fabulous, but that is very rarely the case in life. So when I am working, especially when I have many appointments, I just need one win. What happens, though, when that win doesn't come?
More often than not, we'll find that the win didn't come from where we expected it to, rather than not arriving at all. Take today for an example. We've had some very high highs and some lows with this new venture. And as far as "lows" go, it's been more of a pothole than a trench. The reality is, we've only been doing this for six days, so why the heck would I expect us to have it figured out?
Anyway, we had a string of canceled appointments between yesterday and today. Half of those were just a matter of life happening and needed to be rescheduled. It doesn't matter how much you want to meet with someone; most people won't do it when they have the flu (and honestly, I wouldn't want them to come in anyway). We've had a few more say that they are no longer interested, which is also fine because it's just the nature of doing business. People change their minds all the time, and no matter how good you are, that will still happen.
But I was expecting a shoo-in win today from one of the appointments that called in sick. Again, it wasn't anything that we did wrong; it was simply life happening, and we rescheduled for another day. It's all okay; I just need to find a win somewhere else. There is a win to be seen every single day, no matter how small. More often than not, we can find at least one thing that went our way.
So I am looking for my win. The day is not done for one thing (at least when I am writing this). We have one more appointment which could easily change everything. But the more important note is that I am learning something every step of the way. Everything I realize today makes me better for tomorrow, and that's a win in itself.
I have a tendency to panic quickly, which is why I talk so much about being emotionally level. Anytime there is talk of a wrench, I assume it is coming to throw off my plans. The trick is finding the wins to maintain our enthusiasm. The wrench of deployment can find a win in our spouse being home for that night. The wrench of a poorly timed TDY can see the win of an opportunity to visit somewhere new. The wrench of missed appointments can find the win of time to talk through things with a partner.
Find the win. There is always one to be found, and it often hides in the details. When we look back on our lives, it is easy to spot our missteps, but it is also easier to see the big picture of what we've achieved. The same is true for our days. I got home from my day feeling like it wasn't the best, but when I recounted the day to my husband, he said, "Sounds like you went 2 for 2." And he's right. The scoreboard hasn't ticked over, but we put everything in place to call today a win. Maybe the cards won't fall as we hoped for tomorrow, but I can feel confident calling today a win because we did our best with the hand we were dealt.
The reality is that every day is a win when we chase our dreams because the good and bad days alike put us one step closer to where we need to be. I recommend having a partner who doesn't panic on the same day as you. Everyone has their bad days, but when we take turns with it, we can ease the burden and shift each other back to more neutral territory. Worrying feels like work, but that is not where the work of our dreams lies, and we want to do our best to put our energy towards productive things.