Three Reasons Why I Chose April Fools’ Day to Launch My Dream

 

Today is an exciting and nerve-wracking day for me. After months of planning, my website is finally live and my writing will be out there for the world to see. There is no turning back; after all, the internet is forever. I am launching this site with a pit in my stomach, but I am not allowing the fear to get me again. Today, I persevered. You know this because you can read it right now.

I consider today a soft launch because the blog will typically run Monday, Wednesday and Friday. The official first post will go up this coming Monday. Decisions are often made emotionally and then backed up by logic rather than the other way around, and this launch date certainly follows that thought process. So, I want to share the three reasons my website is going live on Saturday, April 1, 2023, rather than waiting until April 4, which would have matched my writing plan more accurately.

1. I needed to back myself into a corner by announcing a launch date on social media so that I would have to follow through 

I honestly don't know if anyone saw my announcement, but it was out there, and I couldn't change the date without disappointing myself. When it was just the team and me during the website design process, it was simple to push the date back when I didn't feel ready. In fact, I have already done that twice. The original goal was March 1st, and then when I didn't feel prepared, March 15th and then when I still wasn't ready, I decided enough was enough and I needed to commit to the next date, so I picked April 1st. Honestly, it wasn't until later that I even looked at the calendar and realized that the 1st was a Saturday. It was an emotional decision, but that doesn't mean I couldn't find logic to justify it.

2. April is the month of the military child

I'm sure if you live anywhere near a military base, many events are scheduled to celebrate your children this month. I have been part of the planning committee for a field day event for the kids that I will, unfortunately, be out of town for, not that my son is old enough to participate anyways. The reason this month is important to me, as it is for a lot of people, is because of my children. I have one child right now, but eventually, we will try to have another.

As much as my son is one of my biggest priorities right now, I also think about my future children. I have been writing letters to my future daughter since I was in middle school. I would write to her whenever I was struggling, knowing that one day she may come to me looking for advice or commiseration on the same situation. I knew my decisions during those situations would affect what I could tell her when she encountered the same things. I wanted to be able to "show my work," in a sense. I didn't want to jump into action without thought because I didn't want to make the wrong choice. Writing to her helped to clarify my vision and come to terms with the consequences of the choices I wanted to make.

So much of what I am doing now to chase this dream is for my children. Maybe I can make the military spouse community a little bit better, and that ripple effect will help the children my kids become friends with. I want them to know that it is possible to chase your dreams even if you aren't in an ideal situation. The best way to teach them that is to show them, so I have to fight for my dreams today while they watch me battle the difficult situations the military throws at us and persevere through.

Realistically we live in a world where women are often put on the back burner, left with the responsibility of caring for children and the home, ensuring that nothing gets in the way of a spouse's career. Man or woman, I have seen this happen so often with military spouses. We have to be on call and ready to pick up the slack when our spouses deploy or TDY. We have to be prepared to move with little notice and rebuild our community so that someone is there to call when we really need a babysitter. I don't want my son to grow up thinking that this is the role of a spouse. I don't want my future daughter to grow up thinking her goals will come second. My husband and I can only prevent this if we work today to prioritize my dreams in every way we can.

I am doing this for my children in many ways, and a month dedicated to them seems like the perfect time to take my next step.

3. It is kind of a joke that I am a military spouse

On a more light-hearted note, April Fools’ Day is a day of pranks and jokes, the biggest of which is that I became a military spouse. I doubt anyone who knows me thought that this would be the path that I would choose. I'll talk more about my story and how I ended up in this life in the post on Monday, but no one expected me to be here, especially me.

I never thought I would leave North Carolina, yet I live in Oklahoma. I doubt we'll get to live any closer to NC until my husband retires because his career offers limited base options. I am very close to my family, and while we make an incredible effort to see each other often, there are days when the miles between us feel overwhelming. I hate every separation the Air Force has caused in my life, taking my husband on a faraway mission often when I need him the most (Murphy's law, anyone?). And I am not good at being told what to do.

The constant changes to plans, the looming threat of deployments and TDYs, and the potential to pack up and move without any say in where to go are annoying to me on good days and infuriating on bad ones. I don't like requesting leave for my husband to go on trips that someone in a regular 9-5 would have no issues attending. I don't like the tight radius we have to keep with the base before we have to use leave because, for us, that means we are always light on days to use since every family event requires leave. The requirements of this life were not built for me, and I honestly find it hilarious that being a military spouse has become my calling.

I have no doubts about my husband. I absolutely believe that we are meant to be together. I just have a hard time accepting that his job isn't just a job; it's our life. But even as I say that, I am very familiar with a job being something more. I grew up watching my parents build a business; it wasn't just their business but our family's. I felt ownership and pride for our family's choices to grow the business. I have just had difficulty handing ownership of those decisions to someone outside of my family.

I didn't expect to be here. The old saying "Man plans and God laughs" certainly stands true. I think it's kind of a joke that I am a military spouse, but all joking aside, I am going to make the most of this life that I am living by chasing my dream regardless of what the military throws at me. And I think a day dedicated to pranks is the perfect time for my next step.

Thank you for being here for this launch. I am very excited to take this leap into the unknown. I believe in my dream. I have confidence that one day, I will see it come to fruition. I hope you come back next week to hear more of my story and start exploring how we can make all our dreams come true.

-Sarah Hartley

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Fighting for Our Dreams: My Journey Through the Battle and Beyond