The Power Of Morale

I know I said that today's post would be a compiled PCS guide. I've been working on it for a few hours, and it is nowhere near done, so that post will go up on Monday. Today, I wanted to talk instead about morale.

We just got home from my husband's squadron holiday party. Fair warning: I've got two cocktails in me as I write this, so please excuse any typos. This was the first formal type of event that my husband and I have attended since joining the squadron three years ago. Now a lot goes into the reasons that we haven't attended previously:

  1. We travel quite frequently, and I tend to be out of town whenever events come up that I would have been at had I been home.

  2. My husband is not big on dressing up, and a lot of these events end up having formal attire even if the servicemembers aren't required to wear blues.

  3. We hadn't really known ahead of time that any or many of our friends were going to be attending.

But none of those things really mattered when it came to this event. We were in town, which obviously would have affected our ability to attend. The event was an ugly sweater party, so even though my husband loathes single-use clothing (we will be returning the sweaters tomorrow), it did mean that we didn't have to dress up in fancy clothes. But honestly, we didn't know if any of our friends would be there, and we knew quite a few who wouldn't be due to prior obligations.

The most significant factor in whether or not we would be going to this event was the level of morale at the squadron. It didn't really matter how many boxes an event checked if there was a buzz around the squadrons about it happening. My husband has seen three commanders in his time at Tinker. He caught the tail end of the first. We got the full effect of the second. And we will move halfway through the third's term. I'm not going to share any names, and I'm not going to name the squadron, although anyone who knows me knows where we call home. I'm not trying to throw anyone under the bus. I just want to paint a picture of the different types of leadership and how that affected the morale that I felt when my husband came home from work.

The first commander was great. Everyone loved them. My husband only spent a few months under his leadership before he moved on to his next assignment. The nice thing about command positions is that they are only two years long, and the terrible thing about them is that they are only two years long. If you've got a great person, you want them to stay forever, and if you've got someone not so great, you want them out as quickly as possible.

For most of our time at Tinker, we've been under the leadership of that second commander. We saw them through their entire two years. And they were not well-liked. Decisions were made that went directly against the family values that person preached. There were choices made that affected some people's careers in really negative ways. And many decisions were made that affected people's lives in more annoying ways. I had a great relationship with them as a key spouse. Still, I fully recognize that the dynamic between commander and spouse is entirely different from that of commander and employee.

We've also spent most of our time at Tinker, ready to leave. Between the failing aircraft that my husband flies on, clogged training pipelines, and rushed upgrades, my husband was ready for a change of scenery. He wanted a ground assignment where he could always trust the computers to turn on. Living in Oklahoma was never my dream either, so I wanted an assignment that would put me closer to family. But if I couldn't have that, I wanted an assignment where my husband was happy, excited, and fulfilled in his work. We may not find all of that in Georgia, but it certainly checks a lot of boxes.

Since we've gotten this new commander, though, everything has changed. For the first time, almost everyone in the squadron would be comfortable staying for another year. All of us who wanted to jump ship would be happy to stick around to see this commander through.

I can't fully tell you the difference between this one and the last one. I'm not there on a day to day basis to see employee interactions. And I don't know the stats of what the squadron has accomplished under either leadership style. Significant factors played a part in the last commander's daily activities that aren't affecting the new one as much. We underwent a shift in the deployment cycle, the start of a divestment, and a lot of constantly changing information that left many families and service members confused about what would happen next. Our current commander may not have handled those things well either. Maybe morale would plummet because of those things, no matter what the commander did.

What I can tell you is that the squadron feels different. As much as the last commander preached family values and made me feel welcome on the squadron floor, it still felt like an environment I wasn't really supposed to be in. Now, it feels very natural for me to be there. Seeing my husband's final out date posted on the office calendar was a bit sad.

I haven't spent a lot of time with leadership, and I doubt I ever will. My husband doesn't have all that much interest in climbing the ranks beyond his twenty years. But I have met a lot of leadership spouses. So far, I have liked almost every one of them. Because these are the women who make me feel welcome on the base. These are the women who I turn to when I need advice. These are the women who have seen me through it all. Rank didn't play a part in it, and it shouldn't have (our spouse's rank should have no bearing on who we as spouses can be friends with). Somehow, this commander created that environment within the squadron for both the service members in their command and their families.

I don't know exactly what they are doing differently. I have a few guesses but don't have a blueprint for creating great morale. I can tell you that when there is excellent morale, it is hard to miss. The holiday party was so much fun. There were games, raffles, and lots of laughter mixed with yelling. It was fantastic, and as far as my first squadron holiday party goes, it definitely makes me want to come back next year.

Leadership seems to be pretty black and white. It looks like people either end up with someone they love or hate. If your spouse is at a squadron with leadership that they don't agree with or get along with, then encourage them that this time will end. Help them find the joy in the squadron because I promise it is still there. Sometimes, a common enemy forms stronger friendships than anything else. And just trust that good leadership is coming. And if you are the commander of a squadron where morale may be lacking, please be open-minded to things that will actually lift the spirits. Even in hard times, we can find ways to smile. Dog Fridays have gone a long way for this squadron.

There is an old way and a new way of approaching people and the military. The old heads have some strategies that don't mesh as well with the world we live in. But, the new ones are more open-minded and ready to use their position to serve not just themselves but the people they are commanding as well. Hold out for those leaders because one year with this commander was not enough, and I really hope we see them again. The world could use more leaders just like that.

-sarah hartley

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